Hello,
Dear readers and guests of my blog!
Concluding the article entitled 4 stages of overcoming conflict, I promised to share with you a technique for coping with stress.
Which I am happy to do in this publication.
Everyone can effectively combat stress.
In principle, anyone can master several exercises against stress.
In this publication I present a mini-program of exercises to combat tension.
“Mini” - because it’s short. You don't need to spend a lot of time and effort recovering from stress.
To do this, 10-12 minutes in the morning and evening are enough.
In addition, the exercises proposed below can be used both in combination and separately, one at a time or in combinations of 2-3 exercises.
Also, this program can be used once without prior preparation. For example, after an unpleasant event, an emotional conversation or a conflict.
But it should be remembered that...
...this program is designed to combat everyday stress, and in case of extreme stress, more serious measures are needed, including, among other things, psychological assistance and the use of medications.
In addition, these exercises do not affect the causes of stress themselves.
They are aimed at its consequences or symptoms, manifested in the form of nervous tension, self-doubt, restlessness, anxiety, insomnia, pain, absent-mindedness, aggression, rage, anger, etc.
So, all exercises included in the program are divided into four blocks.
- Concentration-deconcentration
- Breathing exercises
- Visualization
- Physical exercise
The time for performing the exercises and the number of repetitions can be arbitrarily changed; be guided by your well-being and feelings of comfort.
So,…
Concentration-deconcentration
The essence of the two exercises below is that they are good for helping to distract from a problematic situation.
Shift attention from disturbing thoughts associated with finding a solution, as well as cope with the stress of anticipation.
- While sitting on a chair or in an armchair, try to fully concentrate on some object (for example, on the hand of a clock or on the toe of your shoe, on a paperclip lying on a desk, etc.). Concentrate your attention only on this subject. Don't let him wander away and do other things. Drive away all negative thoughts and images associated with a stressful situation. In front of you is only your object of concentration, you are completely absorbed in it, completely immersed in it. The duration of the exercise is 1-3 minutes.
- After concentrating on one subject, begin to deconcentrate. To do this, begin to slowly wander your gaze from object to object. Look at all the objects that are in the room or on your desk. Hold each for no more than 2-3 seconds.
Let thoughts and images flow arbitrarily, do not control them. Let your gaze wander wherever it wants. All you have to do is lightly “push” him if he gets “stuck” on some object. Duration 1-3 minutes.
Then, for a minute or two, return to concentration. Concentrate on one subject. Then again deconcentrate for a minute or two, wandering your gaze from object to object.
Sometimes it is enough to repeat 3-4 cycles of concentration and deconcentration to feel better and get rid of tension at least a little.
The main thing is to be able to distract yourself from problematic and disturbing thoughts and not allow them into your consciousness during the exercise.
Stress Prevention
You won’t be able to completely escape stressful situations, but you can change your attitude towards them. Meditation and exercise should be a daily practice.
The psychological attitude is of great importance. An effective technique is called “it could have been worse.” Stress increases when a person fantasizes, exaggerating the consequences of possible events.
Fear of what might happen is already stress, so the best prevention is a critical assessment of future, present and past events.
Exercise 2.
Breath
In the article on how to overcome stress, I have already described a set of breathing exercises that help fight stress.
You can use them. Other options are described here.
- Sit up straight. Count to 10, taking a short breath for each count. Then exhale slowly, completely and continuously. Repeat the cycle 8-10 times.
- Sit up straight. Breathe through your diaphragm (read the article above for how to do this). Inhale for a count of 1-2-3-4-5-6, exhale for a count of 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9. Arbitrary pauses are allowed between inhalation and exhalation. The entire exercise cycle should not cause discomfort and should proceed naturally without force.
After 5-6 breathing cycles, begin to imagine any pleasant, gentle and relaxing images: a house on the lake, a gentle sunset, a beach, a blooming garden, clouds floating across the sky, etc.
Calmly concentrate on one of them or slowly slide your inner gaze from one to another.
Continue to breathe through your diaphragm and imagine pleasant images for 2-3 minutes, while gently but persistently driving away all disturbing thoughts and experiences.
The presentation of images provides a transition to the next block of this program, “Fighting Stress.”
Content:
- 1 Exercises to relieve stress
- 2 Exercise to relieve stress
- 3 The benefits of psychological exercises
- 4 In conclusion
We can highlight both the positive aspects of stress and the negative aspects of this condition. Among the positive ones, the following can be noted: a person whose body experiences a stress reaction increases the likelihood of surviving in a dangerous life situation. This happens due to the fact that the brain begins to function faster, and the fullness of life is felt.
But the negative aspects take over. Since stress is a negative emotion, prolonged stay of the body in such a state becomes dangerous to health. Disturbances appear not only in health, but also in life in general. Therefore, if a woman or man finds himself in a similar situation, it is necessary to take measures to help get rid of stress.
Exercise 3.
Visualization
I described this method in the article on how to deal with stress using visualization
Gradually move to breathing in the usual way, but continue to visualize the images.
Next, imagine that you have some cozy and calm place that belongs only to you and no one else.
This can be either a real place or an imaginary one.
A bench in a park, a mysterious room in a castle, a lake in the mountains, another planet, a forest clearing, a house on a lake, an island in the middle of the ocean, a healing spring, the top of a mountain range, etc.
Or maybe it will be your room or home. The main thing is that you feel pleasant, cozy and calm there.
Imagine that all problems go away, at least for a while, and dissolve somewhere over the horizon.
Stay in your personal sanctuary alone with yourself, relieve tension for a while and relax.
Try to do this exercise regularly. Whenever you enter your personal sanctuary, imagine that all problems and difficulties are left behind you.
Gradually, you will learn to do this intuitively, and if there is excessive psychophysical overload, the psyche itself will direct you to your personal refuge for rest and recuperation.
Techniques for relieving anger, aggression and rage
Aggression is inherent in us by nature itself and, every time we suppress it, we direct our strength against ourselves
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The accumulated energy of anger and anger destroys us from the inside, causing illness, fatigue and depression. Is it worth it? How to free yourself from accumulated grievances and negative emotions? Give vent to your feelings
Outbursts of anger and rage are the body’s protective reaction when our internal fuses are triggered. Thus, we get rid of the emotions and experiences that overwhelm us. But not everyone is capable of this because of their beliefs: some believe that openly expressing anger is bad, others believe that this is how they show their weakness.
But our strength lies in recognizing our weaknesses. Therefore, it is very important to allow yourself to be angry and feel anger. You don't forbid yourself to laugh, do you? And joy is the same natural emotion as anger, only without your internal limitations. Let go of beliefs that hold you back from expressing your true nature and release pent-up emotions without judging yourself.
If you need to express your emotions on a physical level, do so (without harming yourself or others, of course). Take a pillow and start boxing on it, write a hate letter and burn it, lock yourself in your car and scream at the top of your lungs.
Don't push it to the limit
The best way to deal with anger is to express it to the person who made you angry. Just say, “You know, I don’t like it when you do that or when you talk to me...” or “I’m angry with you because...”. Of course, it is not always justified to express everything to your face. You can address the offender through the mirror. Play out the situation that pissed you off, and, imagining in the mirror the one who offended you, express everything you think about him. After your anger has subsided, try to sincerely understand and forgive him. Forgiveness will help you completely free yourself from anger and aggression.
Keep a diary
Have you noticed that similar situations often make us angry? Keep a diary and write down everything that caused your anger. Describe what made you angry and how it made you feel. The world around us works like a big mirror, reflecting what is happening inside us. It often happens that we ourselves provoke certain behavior of people towards us.
Is there something coming from you that makes others want to annoy you? Think about whether the person you dislike reflects what is in you. Perhaps he is doing something that you do not allow yourself to do. Assessing what is happening will help you find the cause of your anger and change your own beliefs.
Learn to pause
An uncontrolled outburst of irritation and anger can greatly harm you, ruining your career or personal life. The price for a moment of weakness can be unreasonably high. Therefore, it is very important to learn how to cope with the indignation or anger that grips you.
The easiest way to cope is to take a deep breath and count to ten. If possible, take a walk. Movement will help you cope with the adrenaline rush.
When you feel like you can barely restrain yourself from saying too much, mentally fill your mouth with water. Let the plot from the fairy tale about enchanted water help you with this.
Once upon a time there lived an old man and an old woman. Not a day went by that they didn't fight. And although both were tired of quarreling, they could not stop. One day a fortune teller came to their house and gave them a bucket of enchanted water: “If you feel like swearing again, take a mouthful of this water, and the quarrel will pass.” As soon as she was out the door, the old woman began to nag the old man. And he took water into his mouth and remained silent. What now, should the old woman shake the air alone? - It takes two to quarrel! So they lost the habit of swearing
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Get rid of pent-up aggression
The following techniques, borrowed from the Taoist teachings of Shou Tao, will help you get rid of anger, anxiety and internal blocks.
Buddha smile
The “Buddha Smile” exercise will allow you to easily achieve a state of mental balance. Calm down and try not to think about anything. Completely relax your facial muscles and imagine how they fill with heaviness and warmth, and then, having lost their elasticity, seem to “flow” down in a pleasant languor. Focus on the corners of your lips.
Imagine how your lips begin to move slightly to the sides, forming a slight smile. Do not exert any muscular effort. You will feel your lips stretch into a subtle smile, and a feeling of incipient joy will appear throughout your body. Try to do this exercise every day until the “Buddha smile” state becomes familiar to you.
One step forward is a beast, one step back is a man
This exercise is especially useful for shy people who are embarrassed by their anger and ashamed of its manifestation. Take a step forward, causing wild rage in yourself, feel the readiness to destroy everything in your path. Then take a step back, performing the “Buddha smile” and returning to a state of absolute calm.
Take a step forward again, transforming into an angry beast, and a step back, returning to the human state. As you step forward, reinforce your rage with screams, you can swear or clench your jaw forcefully. When taking a step back, it is very important to catch the moment of relaxation, paying attention to the muscles.
This exercise requires a lot of emotional investment. Stop as soon as you feel tired. By doing it regularly, you will see that your steps will become faster and faster, and you will learn to easily move from rage to complete calm.
Remember: these techniques and exercises will help temporarily relieve aggression and get rid of anger, but will not eliminate the original cause of their occurrence. Contact a specialist for qualified help. Take care of yourself!
Psychoanalytic studio of Elena Urbanovich
