Hatred is a very difficult feeling to understand, which people often cannot even explain. It seems to them that negative feelings arose out of nowhere, but in fact, such emotions always have their own serious preconditions.
When trying to eliminate hatred towards a person or group of people, many make unforgivable mistakes that only make the problem worse. How can you cope with the negativity in your own heart and gain complete understanding with the world?
Causes of hatred
How to stop hating others is a good question, but it is simply impossible to answer it until the motives for the emergence of negative feelings are fully studied. There can be many reasons for the appearance of such emotions, and here are just the main ones:
- a person feels competition, which generates hatred towards the opponent;
- once two people insulted each other or spoke negatively about the moral qualities of their opponent, which degenerated into a similar feeling in the future;
- hatred can arise due to elementary envy, when one person cannot remain indifferent to the achievements of another;
- sometimes enmity appears as a reaction to the disdainful behavior of one person towards another;
- quite often hatred is born due to the incompatibility of characters.
The basis of such a feeling is always hidden negativity. It all can start with one wrong word, a stupid joke that results in mutual insults. After a couple of months, people already begin to hate each other fiercely.
Rivalry between two individuals also rarely ends well. Moreover, competition can concern both personal life and career sphere. Feeling competition, a person will try to find flaws in his opponent in order to establish his superiority. The desire to be first for both will result in sharp negativity towards each other.
Sometimes hatred arises from simple dissimilarity. If a choleric person and a phlegmatic person begin to communicate, they immediately encounter absolute bipolarity of characters. As a result, the negativity intensifies with each new meeting, turning into burning hatred.
Psychologists confirm that the motive for the emergence of a negative feeling can be absolutely insignificant. But this does not negate the fact that a bad attitude towards an opponent will arise and prove ineradicable.
Only after finding out the motive of the feeling can we move on to solving the question of how to get rid of hatred.
How to get rid of hatred towards all humanity?
How to stop hating people around you? This is a question that requires consultation with a psychologist. Hatred of humanity is a very serious disorder; it can be either an independent specific phobia or a symptom accompanying neuroses and other pathologies.
Of course, hatred of people is not always a sign of mental illness. It can appear after severe nervous shocks, be a consequence of stress, or develop due to a series of insults, humiliations, and insults from others.
It is impossible to understand on your own what exactly such hatred is and cope with it. The help of a specialist and sometimes medication is required.
Why does a person hate everyone around him?
Sometimes there are particularly complex cases of hatred towards everyone around you. In such a situation, a person feels incredibly isolated from the world, because he cannot make friends, build relationships, or even communicate with others. Why does this situation arise?
- A person may have inflated self-esteem, which means that everyone around them does not seem smart or attractive enough. This gives rise to a feeling of superiority, which results in hatred of everyone around.
- Hidden complexes that make a person withdrawn force him to perceive absolutely everyone around him in a negative way.
- Often children in adolescence experience hatred towards everyone around them. This is due to the fact that schoolchildren do not feel understood by adults or peers, and this gives rise to anger and negativity.
- The feeling may be dictated by a simple reluctance to understand the motives of other people's actions and actions. As a result, a person refuses to communicate with the outside world, experiencing negativity towards everyone without exception.
Getting rid of negativity in such a situation is amazingly difficult. Typically, psychologists advise finding one single person, communication with whom will cause the least discomfort. Then, with the help of this friend, you can comprehend the world, finding more and more good friends.
If hatred of everyone without exception arises from rejection of their shortcomings, you will have to learn tolerance. There are no ideal people, and that is why you need to perceive someone’s ignorance or unattractiveness in a positive way. In this case, it will be easier to communicate with the world.
Over time, negativity towards everyone without exception turns into terrifying consequences. Such lonely people often commit crimes, wanting to eliminate those who annoy them, that is, everyone around them. Cases of suicide are not uncommon, because feeling cut off from the whole world, it’s so easy to find yourself in a loop.
Ways to deal with negativity
How to stop hating a person, and is it possible to overcome a negative feeling? Psychologists emphasize that this is possible, but you will have to work hard on yourself. What steps will help you cope with negative emotions?
- It is necessary to list on a piece of paper all the positive qualities of a person in order to at least weaken the negativity towards him.
- It is worth meeting and discussing the situation, trying to find out why the problem arose in the first place.
- Under no circumstances should you stoop to gossip. The less often a person thinks and speaks badly about someone he hates, the better.
- You should learn to be more tolerant of people.
- If all of the above tips turn out to be useless, then it is necessary to minimize contact with the hated person. In the absence of constant communication, the negativity will gradually fade away.
What to do if you hate a person with whom you work or communicate in the same company?
First you need to understand whether these negative emotions are mutual. If your opponent often makes fun of you, spreads rumors and says nasty things behind your back, then we are most likely talking about mutual hostility. In such a situation, the best way to resolve the conflict is conversation. You should sit down and discuss the reasons for the problem. Sometimes it can be some completely insignificant trifle, and sometimes the cause of negativity is hidden sympathy.
If the conversation did not help, then it is necessary to stop the negativity coming from your side. Throwing accusations in one direction and proceeding with bile, the opponent will sooner or later get tired, and the hostility will automatically stop.
How to cope with hatred of a person if all of the above methods turn out to be useless? In this case, psychologists recommend minimizing contacts. If personalities do not communicate or intersect, it becomes more difficult for them to hate each other. Gradually, the hostility completely evaporates.
Hatred of people
Hatred, as a completely natural phenomenon, can arise in everyone, both towards the world around them, towards people, and towards themselves. And often it manifests itself depending on how satisfied a person is or not with his life, achievements, and his personality as a whole.
It is important to note that each of us is able to benefit from this feeling, no matter how strange it may sound. It all depends on how skillfully you manage the hatred that arises. We'll talk about this and much more below.
Reasons for hating people
Psychologists explain the lack of love for people as the result of an individual’s attempt to remove an obstacle in the form of that very hated person who is preventing you from achieving what you want on your life’s path. At the initial moment of its inception, hatred has the appearance of anger that flares up inside you. Depending on the factors that “add fuel to the fire,” this feeling grows, overriding the humane arguments of reason not to pay attention to the annoying actions of the person you hate.
Hatred towards a certain type of person can arise from a long-standing grudge. So, if once in childhood someone hurt you to the depths of your soul, leaving a painful scar in your inner world years later, in the present, when faced with a person associated in your mind with a long-time offender, you are capable of feeling hatred towards him.
Signs of hatred towards a person
When you see the object of your hatred, you may unconsciously experience the following towards him:
- a feeling as if everything is boiling inside, and a couple more moments and you will throw out everything you think about him in the face of the hated object;
- anger;
- rage;
- a passionate desire to humiliate him in any way, to insult him. The option of beating is not excluded, or in extreme cases, killing.
- disgust, desire to quickly get rid of the hated environment;
- contempt, desire to crush such a person;
- indifference, indifference towards a person is the same feeling, but suppressed.
Hatred towards people – is it a disease?
Hatred always finds a convenient place for itself in a person’s subconscious. If you don’t start cleaning up your own inner world sooner or later, this feeling can destroy you. As a result, it leads to serious diseases. First of all, hatred leaves its mark on the health of your eyes and head: migraines, tumors, Parkinson's disease, skin diseases, epilepsy, and this is not the entire list of diseases caused precisely by hateful feelings towards both a person and the world in in general.
A person who hates people strives to elevate his own morality and decency above everything. It is important to note that the nature of his illness depends on what exactly this feeling is directed towards.
How to overcome hatred towards a person?
By asking yourself the question “How to overcome hatred of a person?”, you are already on the right path, because you are looking for ways out of a self-destructive situation. Therefore, the most important thing is to determine the cause of that very hatred. There is no point in leaving the problem unresolved. It is important to spend some time thinking about the factors that contribute to this negative feeling. It wouldn’t hurt to write the answer down on a piece of paper. You should return to it after a couple of days. Thus, you will be able to look at the current situation with different eyes.
Positive emotions and thoughts will help overcome hatred. Learn to monitor what's going on in your head throughout the workday.
At the end of the day, take advantage of the instant hatred. Are you not attracted to a certain type of person? Then write down what specifically doesn’t suit you about them and promise yourself that you will not become such a person. Such a lesson can be regarded as a period of self-improvement, improvement of one’s own qualities, which supposedly do not exist in those whom you hate so much.
Cases when it is impossible to cope with negativity
Most often, people mistake elementary hostility for hatred, which is much simpler in its motivation. However, there are situations when it is simply impossible to get rid of unpleasant sensations. This is due to deep feelings, personal disgust, which always has reasons.
Thus, an abandoned wife is unlikely to be able to forgive the homewrecker and come to terms with what happened. The father of a dead child will not stop hating the killer, even if two dozen psychologists come to his aid.
In such a situation, the only reasonable solution is to completely ignore this person. You should not follow him on social networks, judge him or look for a meeting. Minimal contact will ultimately help smooth out the negative at least a little.
Not everyone can find out the answer to the question of how to overcome hatred of a person. The problem here is that to get rid of negativity you need to change a little yourself. You will have to reconsider your views, beliefs, emotions. However, one must fight such a black feeling to the end, because it is capable of destroying its bearer from within.
Marina, Engels
