Willpower is a flexible skill that covers the lack of many others and helps tremendously in acquiring them. Scientists have long been saying that this is a limited resource that needs to be protected and replenished. How willpower is affected by the state of the body and the environment, why self-pity is not so bad, what is necessary to save (and acquire) willpower and how to trick your brain - read in this article.
Get enough sleep
Good sleep is the basis for normal willpower. In a sleep-deprived state, you certainly won’t want to push yourself to do anything. Most people know about this, but few actually implement this habit into their lives.
Poor sleep will make you weak and tired. It has a direct impact on the ability to concentrate and decision making. Kelly McGonigal, author of The Willpower Instinct: How Self-Control Works, Why It's Important, and How You Can Improve It?, emphasizes the importance of getting enough hours of sleep:
Sleep deprivation (even sleeping less than 6 hours a night) is chronic stress that disrupts how your body and brain use energy. The prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for volition and the response to stress, is particularly affected by this.
Try to sleep 7-8 hours a day - no more and no less. This will give your body enough time to recharge its batteries and synthesize all the necessary substances. Thus, it is known that the hormone melatonin, which is very important for our well-being, is synthesized in the largest quantities from 23:00 to 2:00. A good rest will allow you to wake up refreshed and ready for all life's challenges.
Why am I doing this?
Motivation is what fuels willpower in the first place and is its strong foundation. If you don’t understand why you should do something, then it’s not surprising that you will shirk every time, and no exercises, tricks or life hacks will help you.
Therefore, start developing willpower from the main thing. Take time to figure out the goals you want to achieve in life and in the short term. By the way, in our opinion, this topic is described very well in J. Canfield’s book “A Whole Life.” Once you understand your goals and the actions you need to take to achieve them, it will be easier for you to activate your willpower.
It's even better if you paint a vivid picture in your head of how you will look, think and feel when you achieve your goal. Imagine it before your eyes every time you are tempted to deviate from your chosen path, and you will be able to resist. Let your willpower become better day by day by your conscious choice, and not by the influence of life's blows and circumstances. Remember your goals and never give up. As Michael Jordan said, “You're not a loser until you give up.”
Meditate
Meditation is a great way to increase your willpower. Long enough practice also improves concentration, self-awareness and reduces stress levels.
What is equally important is that meditation does not require a lot of time and lengthy preparation. Just a few minutes a day can already have a fairly noticeable effect.
It does not require the conditions of a Buddhist monastery to be effective.
Sit comfortably in a suitable place in your home, close your eyes and try to clear your head of unnecessary thoughts. This will be very difficult at first - at least try not to focus on one of them for too long. Let them flow freely through your brain. Listen to the sensations in your body, to your breathing, relax all your muscles - this will allow you to concentrate on your inner world.
Many studies show changes after 8 weeks of short daily meditations. Spend 10 to 15 minutes every day and you won't be disappointed with the results.
Warm-up
Having understood the definition of what willpower means, it’s time to learn how to train it. Take note of a couple of simple ways:
- Start your actions from the “I won’t” position. Try not to use strong words in your speech, do not swing your leg while sitting, do not wrap your hair around your fingers, etc.
- Make it a rule to pronounce the expression “I will” and live up to it. Every day, set aside time for meditation, take a contrast shower, walk, etc.
By performing these simple tasks every day, you can strengthen your self-control, ability to concentrate, and resist momentary impulses.
Implement good habits
Habits are a way to perform actions without losing mental energy, automatically. They allow you to do the same thing day after day, without spending a drop of willpower on it, the reserves of which are limited for each person.
Having spent time and energy once on implementing the desired habit, you will save an order of magnitude more in the future. The easiest way is not to do it from scratch, but to replace old, unnecessary or bad habits with new ones. Automatisms are formed due to the fact that the brain receives a certain reward in the form of a release of joy neurotransmitters - dopamine and endorphins - after performing a certain action. For example, after smoking a cigarette. There is no need to deprive him of this reward - just change the source of pleasure. For example, the brain will like morning meditation no less than scrolling through a social media feed.
In addition, under the influence of stress, we tend to go into automatic mode, escaping from unpleasant influences with the help of habits - good or bad. Therefore, if you feel stressed at the end of the working day, it is better to go to the gym rather than to the bar. You will receive your dose of endorphins and thereby further strengthen your new healthy habit.
Theory
Why is willpower needed?
For example, you decided to quit smoking (you can replace “quit smoking” with any other goal: lose weight, stop drinking, work more, start playing sports, etc.). You have an intention (to give up cigarettes), which is based on a reasonable desire to lead a healthier lifestyle, live longer, and spend less money on cigarettes.
This intention is opposed by the habit of smoking, the desire to indulge one’s weakness, and the positive emotions associated with smoking. It depends on your willpower whether you will be able to neglect immediate desires in order to achieve a long-term goal, whether you will be able to quit smoking and maintain health.
It is like a tug of war, on the one hand, long-term plans that reflect the natural aspirations of the individual, on the other, momentary desires and instincts. Roughly speaking, it is a battle between the mind and the body.
The mind says: smoking is harmful and people die from it. You have to get up early to get everything done. You need to eat less to be healthy and beautiful.
The body answers: there is nothing more pleasant than a morning cigarette with coffee, maybe you can allow yourself such a pleasure? Why get up so early? Get some more sleep! Eat this delicious cake, you're hungry! So what if it’s 2 am?
This is a confrontation between lower and higher level desires. My wife, when asked if you want to go to fast food, sometimes answers: I want to, but I don’t want to. She means that, on the one hand, her brain wants the pleasure associated with the absorption of affordable and tasty (due to food additives) food, but on the other hand, she does not want to spoil her health with fatty foods and gain weight.
The more developed willpower, the easier we conquer our body, winning the victory of higher desires over lower ones, in our every business, in every endeavor. The weaker the will, the more difficult it is to resist the weaknesses, habits and lower needs of the body.
Lack of willpower is lack of freedom
A person with weak willpower risks falling into eternal slavery of his body and his habits. Driven by blind instincts, he will no longer have any right to choose.
If the body ordered to sleep until lunch, then this person will do this, even if he has some important things to do at this time.
If the body has ordered to eat, then the person will stuff a third hamburger into himself, even if his ass no longer fits into the elevator, and he cannot climb the stairs due to shortness of breath.
If his body tells him to drink, he drinks until he passes out and his liver bursts.
This person may be very aware of his problems and where they lead. Perhaps he even passionately wants to get rid of them, start a new life, gain freedom from desires, but he fails. He lacks the strength to say to his desires: “No, today I decide for myself what to do, you don’t command me anymore!”, since the person does not have developed willpower.
Therefore, he suffers: his intentions are not realized, and his plans are not carried out. This, you see, is not the most enviable position.
Is willpower developable?
The good news is that willpower can be developed. Every person, no matter what neglected situation he is in, no matter how weak he is, can gain control over his desires.
Just a few years ago I myself suffered from a complete lack of self-discipline. I was disorganized, distracted, and lazy. I could not do any work for a long time, as I quickly became bored with it. It was difficult for me to cope with laziness: I didn’t want to do absolutely anything. I couldn't control my habits: I smoked and drank a lot.
This had a negative impact on my quality of life. Internal disorder creates external disorder. Several times I was on the verge of being kicked out of the institute. I did poorly on exams because I didn't prepare for them. I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I could do any nonsense: surf the Internet aimlessly, drink beer, watch TV series, just not study.
I wasn’t doing well at work, because everything was falling out of my hands, I couldn’t force myself to do anything. Health problems were observed: panic attacks, attention deficit, excess weight. I didn’t have enough willpower to start playing sports and getting my own body in order.
Now everything in my life is much better: my health is good, my job also suits me, I don’t drink, smoke or use other drugs. All this is in the past. After all, you are looking at this site that I have spent a lot of time and effort on.
It cost and costs me a lot of willpower. Almost every day I force myself to work, overcoming laziness. Willpower gave me the opportunity to achieve my goal.
I want to develop this site, I want to help people and I do it.
I wanted to quit smoking and drinking - I did it.
I want to develop, so every day I work on myself: I meditate, play sports, yoga, read books.
I implement my plans now, rather than procrastinate out of laziness. I want to do it, I can do it and I do it.
This formulation expresses the great freedom that willpower gives us. Willpower can be a good foundation for good health, strong relationships, personal happiness and well-being.
Why is it so difficult to gain power over desires?
Our body is a stunning example of nature's design. The body promptly informs us about emerging needs, supports tissue metabolism, processes some substances and produces others, like a large laboratory.
And all this works automatically; we don’t have to regulate, for example, the process of delivering nutrients from the stomach to other parts of the body. All this happens on its own, without affecting our consciousness.
All these processes were “designed” by evolution with amazing care and encoded in the genetic code.
The body's automatic, unconscious mechanisms are very smart and complex, like a supercomputer. But, like a mindless machine, they are severely limited in their capabilities unless supported by human intelligence.
No matter how smart a computer is, it can be infected with a virus that will force it to perform the same operation in a circle until all memory resources are used.
Only a person, a machine operator, or a programmer can solve this problem. The computer does not think about the fact that it is already launching the execution of a malicious program; it does it thoughtlessly, because it has no consciousness.
The wisdom and stupidity of our body
The same thing happens with our body. No matter how complex it is, its work requires the intervention of the mind. For example, you are a smoker. The action of nicotine provokes your brain to produce substances that are responsible for feelings of pleasure.
If the body gets used to nicotine, then without its participation less of these substances are released, and you feel the desire to smoke, as a response to the body’s need to resume chemical metabolism.
Everyone knows that smoking is harmful, everyone is well aware that smoking leads to illness and death. Nevertheless, the body continues to blindly demand a new dose of a substance that is unnecessary and harmful to it, just as it demands water or food, what it really needs for life.
The body executes a mindless malicious program at the level of chemical metabolism in the brain, like a regular computer infected with a virus. The mind can give the command to stop this program. Whether it will be fulfilled or not depends on your will.
Another example of such unreasonable behavior of the body can be found in the reluctance to get up early and do exercises. Exercise is good for the body, awakens it, fills it with tone.
Why, if it is so useful, does the body resist it so much, and sometimes incredible efforts of will are needed to force oneself to get out of bed and move?
Again, the point is in the unconscious algorithms of our body. The body is accustomed to reacting with activity to danger. Why should he put himself in motion when nothing threatens you, you are basking in a warm bed in the safest environment!
Then, to perk up and provide health benefits, you say. But the body does not know about this, it is guided by the present moment, considerations of immediate necessity, an unchanging algorithm of work!
Only a mind that knows that sports is good and smoking is bad has a sense of mental perspective, knowledge and experience. The mind tells you that it will be better if you stop smoking and go in for sports.
The mind is on the other side of the unconditioned, blind reflexes of the body, and the will implements its plans.
Willpower allows you to do what you don't want to do (lower-level desires) but need to do (higher-level motives).
Why do you need to train your body?
Constantly indulging your body, your lower desires, eventually turns into a habit. The more you follow the lead of your momentary weaknesses, emotions and laziness, the more power these forces gain over you. It's like drug addiction.
This is why it is so difficult for lazy people to pull themselves together. Even the thought of starting to move somewhere, to step over themselves, instills fear in them, because they are too strongly attached to the desires of their body.
The body needs to be kept under constant control, trained, only then can you become independent of your base desires and stop being hostages of the present moment in time!
I am sure that many people do not eat meat not because of an exaggerated sense of pity for animals, but because for them the desires of the body do not play such a key role as for others.
And if so, then higher needs (considerations of a healthy lifestyle, ethics, religion) begin to prevail over lower ones (to enjoy the usual food, to fill the stomach). But this is the goal of developing willpower, self-discipline and one of the goals of self-development in general!
I am not a vegetarian, for the reason that you cannot get all the necessary vitamins (B12, D) from plant foods. But recently, I have greatly limited my meat consumption for reasons of healthy eating. I only eat fish and, at the same time, I don’t eat it every day. (More details in my article: “Vegetarianism pros and cons”)
But before, I ate meat for breakfast, lunch and dinner and could not imagine a different order of things.
I am not a passionate animal advocate or a fanatical preacher of a healthy lifestyle. I don’t eat meat because it’s easy for me to do; it’s not difficult for me to deny myself this pleasure, for the sake of healthy eating principles and just for the sake of experimentation. Because I trained myself to say no to my body and say yes to my mind.
The pleasure of eating meat is not a significant criterion for me to eat it if I am pursuing some long-term goals. It’s easy for me to refuse the pleasure that alcohol brings, I can get up early and do exercises, no matter how much I like it. This is not a big difficulty for me, my body listens to me.
Are our body's desires really that important?
Some of you who are now reading this article may think that denying yourself some pleasure every day is incredibly difficult. This is wrong. In order to refute this belief, I described my experience.
Now, to many of you, the small pleasures of the body may seem significant and great. You may think that you can't live without your habits. I assure you, this is an illusion. As a child, I thought that driving a car and, at the same time, navigating the city was very difficult. Now I can easily drive a car and know where to go and where to turn.
Once you educate your body, all its desires will no longer be so significant and important. Do not think that I am preaching some kind of monastic lifestyle, calling for getting rid of attachment to the body and becoming a pure spirit. This is impossible. I just want you to become masters of your body, not slaves to it.
This is great happiness and freedom, I assure you.
Exercise and eat right
Good food and physical activity, as well as sleep, are critical to maintaining and even increasing willpower.
This is probably the most overlooked good habit. The easiest way is to give in to temptation and eat like crazy, feeling guilty afterwards. But what you eat and how much you exercise has a direct impact on your energy levels and how your prefrontal cortex will work.
Healthy eating is not quantum physics. It is enough to eat regularly, eat more plant foods and seafood so that the body receives all the necessary substances in the right quantities.
Regular training increases the level of endorphins in the body, reduces fat percentage, improves blood supply to the brain, and improves immunity. Recent studies have shown that physical activity is one of the most effective remedies against depression and anxiety. Finally, it also increases your willpower.
In one study, participants were given a free gym membership and personalized workout programs were developed for them. All those who exercised regularly reported that they began to smoke less, drink alcohol and drink caffeine after a few months. They also began to eat better, their emotional self-control, and their academic performance increased.
Choose your favorite activity, such as running, cycling, martial arts, swimming or any other. And exercise them at least 2 times a week.
Do what you wish!
No matter how strange this attitude may seem, in reality it can help overcome apathy and develop strong-willed qualities. Think of less desirable things to do—clean the house, wash the dishes, take out the trash. Don’t wait until tomorrow, otherwise tomorrow’s worries will double. Learn to solve problems small, and after a few months you will notice positive results.
Running will not only keep you in good physical shape and will have a positive effect on your health and well-being, and will also be a wonderful answer to the question of how to train willpower. To jog, you need to wake up early, get ready, go to the park or stadium, run about 8 kilometers, and believe me, this is worth the effort of will. No matter what sidelong glances and mocking smiles you encounter from passers-by, do not pay attention. They understand what a tremendous job you do.
Change the environment
Even if we don't realize it, the world around us has a huge influence on our behavior. This applies to such noticeable things as loud noises, uncomfortable chairs, dim lights, and small, almost inconceivable details such as atmospheric pressure or electromagnetic fields.
If you eat with a large spoon or use a large plate, you are likely to eat more. Turn off your phone and put it away - and you will be less tempted to be distracted by it while working. Just changing your environment can be an effective way to avoid distractions and conserve your willpower.
Try to associate your environment with a specific task. Your desk or office should be related to work or study, so fill it with relevant items. Having distracting items at your fingertips will likely cause you to become distracted and lead to poor performance.
You can also make certain tasks easier or more difficult. If you want to stop watching TV too much, try turning it off or removing the batteries from the remote. Do you want to run in the morning? Try packing your workout clothes the night before and leaving them next to your bed.
Move everything you want to focus on closer and keep things that take away your attention away.
How willpower manifests itself
If everything is clear about lack of will, then how can we determine the volitional qualities of a person? People with high willpower have the following traits:
- Independence. The ability to not depend on anyone, to rely only on yourself in everything, not to rely on other people’s opinions, not to seek help when you can handle it yourself.
- Determination . Such people always know exactly what they want and move towards their goals no matter what.
- Persistence . If something doesn’t work out or something is denied, this is not a reason not to start again, not to try again and give up what you planned.
- Initiative . Volitional qualities presuppose the ability to act and make decisions without external pressure or instructions.
- Self-control . Impulsiveness, hot temper, and nervousness do not contribute to willpower. To have a strong will, you need to learn to overcome your external and internal difficulties, to rid yourself of such qualities as fear and indecision.
A strong-willed person is always determined by his actions and results. You can know a lot and say smart things. But all this has absolutely no meaning if it is not applied in life and does not bring the desired results.
This is also interesting:
How to be a wise person regardless of age
Eliminate unnecessary decisions
Have you ever wondered how many decisions you make on a typical day? From the simple ones, like what to drink with lunch, to the most important or complex ones, like negotiating that big sale you want to pull off. What about a week or a month?
Researchers at Cornell University estimate that we make about 200 decisions a day regarding food and drink choices alone, although most of them remain subconscious. Their total number seems gigantic. And each of them (primarily conscious) requires its own portion of willpower. Limit the number of decisions you make to focus on the ones that really matter.
Pre-planning is a very good way to minimize unnecessary dilemmas. In order to schedule your day hourly, you will need no more than 10-15 minutes. In the future, you will not painfully go through different options for action and will be less likely to commit an impulsive emotional act. You already have a route map - just follow it.
Postpone pleasures
Our brain insists on meeting needs right here and now. The prospects looming somewhere in the distance to gain slimness, financial independence, good health, a successful life - do not seem so important. Because of this, we constantly succumb to temptations - we neglect our diet, spend large sums on trinkets, and irrationally distribute our free time.
Try to be patient a little. Delay the moment of getting what you want for 10 minutes. This is quite a bit, but during this period your consciousness will “reconsider priorities” and will be more likely to make the right decision.
Show yourself compassion
Contrary to popular belief, there is ample evidence that self-compassion works much better than self-criticism when dealing with failure or not achieving a certain goal.
In a study conducted at a women's college, researchers divided participants into two groups and asked each group to eat a donut from a plate. Then the experimenters talked to one of the groups. They told the participants phrases that went something like the following: “I hope you don’t find it difficult to eat these donuts. Everyone eats unhealthy food sometimes. All participants in this study eat donuts.” Later, participants were asked to eat some chocolate. And the group that was treated earlier consumed much less sweets than the control group.
People who practice self-compassion tend to be more willing to admit and learn from their mistakes, and to address their weaknesses.
When we realize that failing is a normal part of our lives and that we can learn from them, it will be easier to bounce back from setbacks and make positive changes.
What is it for?
Imagine that you want to lose weight for the upcoming summer season. You are driven by an intention (to eliminate unhealthy high-calorie foods from your diet), based on the desire to look good, wear beautiful fashionable clothes, and have good health.
This desire will be actively resisted by the habit of enjoying sweets and fatty foods, and the inability to resist temptations. The final result will depend on whether you manage to understand how to develop discipline and train your willpower. To lose weight, it is very important to adhere to a certain diet, cope with sudden attacks of hunger, and be able to refuse to buy sweets and other unhealthy foods.
The whole process is like a tug of war. On the one hand, this is a global task (to lose weight), on the other hand, there is an almost uncontrollable desire to eat to capacity.
It is an endless struggle between primitive desires and the desire for more. If a person can figure out how to train and increase willpower, he can effectively resist lower-level impulses in any situation. With low determination, it is very difficult to overcome your own weaknesses.
Use the 2 minute rule
Whenever you find it difficult to force yourself to do something, tell yourself: “I will only do this for 2 minutes.” You've probably noticed that starting to do something is the most difficult part of the task. Once things get moving, the going becomes much easier. Instead of telling yourself how much you don't want to do something, make an initial effort to do one small piece of work. It’s easier to decide on something small than something big. Read one page of a book or run one lap of a stadium.
There is a 90% chance that you will continue your activity after the first 2 minutes. At the very least, it will be much easier to decide on the next step. By moving a heavy steel ball from its place, it is easier to maintain the movement rather than stop it. The 2-minute rule is a great way to overcome the first and most difficult barrier of procrastination: getting started.
Are the desires of our body so important?
Many people believe that purposefully denying yourself the satisfaction of needs is prohibitively difficult. In reality this is not the case. People are often sensitive to their small pleasures, turning them into significant ones that they cannot do without. In fact, it only seems so.
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It's the same with our body. If he is raised correctly, all his primitive needs will lose their significance. And this does not mean at all that one should renounce primary desires, turning into a monk following the path of the spirit. You need to know moderation in everything and learn to be a master and not a slave. Everyone should know how to gain and develop willpower.
Make your biology work for you
You've probably heard about the existence of so-called biological rhythms - cyclical changes in the human body at certain periods of time. There are annual, monthly and other rhythms. However, we are interested in circadian ones - those associated with daily fluctuations in biological activity.
Each person has their own peaks of activity, and, accordingly, their willpower capabilities. For some it is easier to work in the morning, for others in the afternoon. Do a little research. Keep a diary and note how you feel throughout the day. After some time, you will discover certain patterns - at some hours you work worse, at others - better. You can do the same research for the days of the week.
Now you can change your plans according to biorhythms. Set the most difficult tasks that require maximum willpower at a time when your activity will be highest.
Psychic phenomenon
Experts in the field of philosophy and psychology, trying to determine what human will is, proposed calling it a unique phenomenon of a person regulating his own activities. In many respects, it is precisely due to this aspect that a vector orientation of consciousness and its states towards an indefinite goal is possible. Will allows you to concentrate your efforts in order to achieve what you want. A characteristic feature of will is the impossibility of reducing a phenomenon to a specific objective aspect. It cannot be called pure extra-practical consciousness. Will represents the connection between an action, an object, an object, an impulse, a need.
The study of the will and human activity allows us to say with confidence that this mental function presupposes objectification by the subject and legitimation of desire, its selection into a goal. To some extent, will is the result of reflective reasoning about a person’s needs, and at the same time it is a predictive analysis of what may result from an action. Will is a combination of desire and a sense of obligation, combined with the concentration of efforts that must be made to implement what is formulated. Will at the same time is the ability of a person to realize the dominant goal, distinguish it from all others and abandon alternatives that impede the achievement of the goal. The core of the act of will is awareness of the value of the goal and the significance of its implementation for the person. Psychologists point out that will is always associated with a person’s ability to assess the correspondence between the formulated goal and the internal scale of values.
Summary
Our physiology has a huge impact on our mental state, including our willpower reserves. So take care of your body - get enough sleep, eat healthy foods and make time for physical activity. Study your biorhythms and plan your day according to them. Meditate - just 10-15 minutes of this practice will bring about long-term changes in your willpower. Introduce healthy habits - this will allow you to put many energy-consuming actions on automatic. Pay attention to the things around you - are they distracting you from the task at hand? Use the 2-minute rule to overcome resting inertia and solve problems in parts.
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Key words:1Psychoregulation, 3Psychoregulation
Why do you need training?
Regularly indulging our primitive desires, we eventually acquire bad habits. One after another ad infinitum. The more often we demonstrate weakness of character and allow ourselves not to resist impulses, the more they rise above us. This is very similar to drug addiction, which is extremely difficult to get rid of.
It is difficult for a lazy person to control himself and control his actions. Just thinking about the need to pave the way, he is already afraid of not coping with the task.
That is why the body needs to be trained, kept under control, and not allowed to relax. There are many recommendations and exercises for developing willpower, thanks to which you will be able to gain the desired independence.
