Secondary benefits of illness in psychology: what are they?

Secondary benefit - escape into illness

Secondary benefit is the benefit that a person receives at the stage when painful symptoms have already formed the disease .
This is a kind of “additional profit” that a person does not always count on when consciously or unconsciously deciding to get sick. Without provoking new symptoms of the disease, secondary benefit stimulates the consolidation of the disease and psychological resistance to cure. For example, if quarrels in the family or at work occur regularly, the secondary benefit may be increased blood pressure with ongoing headaches. Like primary, secondary benefit manifests itself externally and internally. At the external level, these are the advantages that a person can receive in interpersonal relationships and current life situations. On the internal side – the opportunity to satisfy your narcissistic needs. Since Freud, psychiatrists have called this phenomenon “flight into illness,” where the symptoms of the disease become “pleasant and desirable.”

A classic example: the first attack of bronchial asthma in a child, which occurred at the time of a fierce parental quarrel. Seeing the child’s condition, the parents immediately forget about the quarrel and join forces in helping. This is how the child receives the primary benefit from the unconsciously arising symptom. Further, his unconscious establishes a logical connection between peace in the family and the illness he is experiencing, but at the level of secondary benefit.

In any illness there are two components: meaning and a set of satisfied needs. As long as there is meaning and an unsatisfied need, a person is sick.

Control your emotions

Sometimes emotions get in the way of acting in accordance with your interests. Some people do things to their own detriment, just to annoy someone or to let off steam, and then they regret their own actions. If you don't want to repeat these mistakes, learn to control your emotions and plan ahead for future moves.

Remember that revenge is a completely unconstructive feeling. In an effort to do bad things to a person, you forget about your real interests and miss the opportunity to truly benefit from the situation. The satisfaction of getting your enemy into trouble because of you is rather elusive. You won't get real pleasure from revenge, believe me. Therefore, you should not waste your time and energy on it.

Calm down, don’t make any decisions in the heat of passion. Soberly assess the situation and think through several options for the development of events. If your goal is to benefit yourself, focus on that and put aside all other thoughts for now. Sometimes a person cannot do what he needs to do because of excessive pride. Of course, there is no need to humiliate yourself. But sometimes you have to bend to the situation to improve your situation. In such cases, you need to compare what you lose and what you gain, and make a decision based on this.

Five secondary benefits from Carl and Stephanie Simonton

Psychologists Carl and Stephanie Simonton mentioned the main benefits that a person’s illness brings to them:

• Temporarily leaving a situation that causes discomfort and complex inconvenient problems that require solutions. The subconscious, “keeping its hand on our pulse,” will always signal us when the body or psyche needs a break. An example of such a reaction is heaviness or pain in the head. This makes ORZ a great way to spend the last week before a planned vacation at home. Moreover, work is like a bone in the throat.
• An opportunity to receive the missing portion of love, care and attention from those around you. Most often, loved ones become donors of positive emotions.
• Comfortable conditions for the redistribution of mental energy, which allows you to concentrate on solving the problem. This factor greatly helps psychotherapists when working with couples.
• An incentive to re-evaluate oneself as a person and correct the stereotypes and behavior patterns used. The disease, in this case, is a warning from the body and subconscious, giving a person time to reassess his way of life and search for alternative areas of activity.
• Complete leveling, or a significant reduction in the level of demands placed on a person by others, or by oneself. This secondary benefit, oddly enough, is often sought out by members of “workaholic” groups – people suffering from addictions or eating disorders.

Definition

What is secondary benefit? This syndrome is a person’s habit of benefiting from his misfortune. A person, finding himself in a difficult situation, for example, falling ill, can revel in his grief. The person will feel bad, but at the same time he will be surrounded by care and love. The person will not have to do anything. You can lie on the couch all day and watch your favorite TV series. From the outside it will seem that the person is suffering. After all, high fever, constant IVs and injections will seem like hard labor. But the person will agree to endure such torture of his body in order to receive the benefit that comes from feeling unwell. And it’s not just people who are always sick who get this kind of benefit. Individuals who suffer from loneliness, live with a small salary or with a tyrant husband also endure their deplorable situation for a reason. They are pleased with the situation in which they find themselves. Such persons cannot be called masochists. After all, they derive significant benefits for themselves and they consider relative inconveniences to be a small price to pay for all the other delights that life gives.

Secondary gain, like “honest” blackmail

A lonely old woman, in a fit of revelation, confessed to a psychotherapist that she was ready to die from the disease that she had been diagnosed with. In return, she would like one thing - to see her son more often. Because he, having started a family and become a respectable father of the family, completely forgot the way to home. Such secondary gain, in the language of psychotherapists, is called “honest blackmail.”

Sometimes illness becomes a way for a person to protect himself from something that, in his opinion, poses a more serious danger. This could be the threat of dismissal, divorce or other large-scale life troubles. This is exactly how a man explains why he can leave his wife and go to his young mistress when his wife is “seriously ill.”

Fear of big goals and change

There is an opinion that each disease can be associated with a certain psychological problem, that “all diseases are caused by nerves.” A mystery for medicine is presented by apparently completely healthy patients who demonstrate all the symptoms of a certain disease, without “apparent” reasons. This is exactly the situation when the reason is the search for secondary benefits, for which no cure has yet been invented.

Example: one patient, for several years, diligently collected several phobias at once, including claustrophobia, cardiophobia - fear of dying from heart disease, fear of unfamiliar food due to fear of an allergic reaction. Considering that at her age the woman had an unusually healthy young heart, and never suffered from allergies a single day in her life. At the moment of “insight,” she revealed to the psychotherapist that “... She is mortally afraid of another, better life!”

In our example, the person was ready to acquire many medical problems and artificial restrictions in order to forever push away the problem of personal unfulfillment. And in fact, why strive for something and achieve something if, firstly, “I have chronic depression and am not interested in anything at all.” And secondly - “if something interested me, it would probably only be until the moment of dramatic changes”?

Having puzzled the psychotherapist, she soon gave up on treatment and found an outlet - “the love of her life”, who created all the conditions for maintaining her phobias.

Aquarius

Representatives of this sign are often the kindest people who will try not to notice the bad in others. And they will do it persistently for a long time. And the point here, in general, is not just about kindness of heart. Aquarians generally tend to live in their fantasies, where people are better than they are, the trees are taller, and the grass is greener. And in order to continue to do this, they may lie to themselves and to your face about what a sweet and wonderful person you are in every way.

Aquarians will cling to the image and illusion they have created to the last. They will communicate with a person they find unpleasant and even somewhere in their souls they will sincerely believe that not everything is so bad. And in general, maybe it just seemed like it. This behavior doesn't just harm Aquarians. It harms their own mental health. To the point that long-term depression may develop and the help of specialists may be needed. So, in their case, hypocrisy and lies are always bad, whatever the motives.

Author: Yulia Telenitskaya

Hide and seek

Suffering is the most fertile ground for escape from oneself and self-justification. A suffering person always finds meaning in living. Life acquires a special dimension, value, meaning and clarity. Pain and fears help create an additional wall from reality and oneself. This is why people so carefully protect the true causes of their problems from outsiders. Pain, fears and unimportant routine are all ways to avoid being face-to-face with yourself and your life. Time crammed full of things to do, constant overload, poor sleep and unhealthy diet guarantee nervous breakdowns or exhaustion.

The philosophy of secondary gain is simple - everything and everyone is more important than myself. I am not yet ready to solve the piles of my own problems.

Secondary benefit of the victim and “codependent” rescuers

Secondary benefits from “social” diseases deserve special attention. Let's think: who will be the first to suffer if an alcoholic or drug addict with experience is cured? Of course, the entire burden of such changes will fall on the immediate family. First of all, those who fought for many years to save a drowning man and saw in this the highest meaning of their whole life. It’s a paradox, but it is they who often unconsciously oppose the physical and psychological recovery of the victim. In case of recovery of an addicted person, the usual meaning of life disappears - they are left alone with themselves.

In turn, the “victim,” dependent on his addiction, has a socially disadvantaged status that promises secondary benefits. And in fact, they have no reason to bother themselves with thoughts about the future, since there is no goal in life. They have no reason to put effort into self-development, waste time on studying, and energy on earning money. “Are you having a bad time?” - You ask. “Not a fact,” comes the balanced answer.

Professional psychologists working with street children will say that six months of a teenager’s stay in the realities of the “street” will require one to two years of rehabilitation under normal conditions in order to return their psyche to its starting point. If he lives on the street for more than two years, all known measures of pedagogical influence no longer work. In this case, social secondary benefits are: the absence of any coercion; the opportunity to live not as society dictates, but “as you want”; specific conditions of survival.

Despite the obvious disadvantages and significant risks, such an existence turns out to be attractive in its own way. That is why Mark Twain’s hero, Huckleberry Finn, even in the most favorable conditions, repeated to himself: “... and I’ll probably run away again.” And he ran away.

Benefits in the system

In the comments in the previous article, I was asked: “What benefits can come from scandals and betrayals?” Benefits are the games people play. But don't confuse profit and pleasure. These are completely different things.

For example, what benefits do spouses get when their husband cheats? Yes - yes, both spouses!

Benefits for husband:

• He feels comfortable and good (wife plus mistress - self-affirmation)
• Both need it (“in high demand”)
• Avoidance of responsibility

Benefits for the wife:

• Material security
• She is not alone, she has a husband (social significance)
• She can easily change
• “Victory” over all the husband’s mistresses (if he does not leave the family)

Benefits for the child:

• No super-custody or control
• Can do whatever he wants
• Can manipulate parents.

Benefits in case of constant scandals:

• After a scandal, reconciliation is a must
• Spouses thus color their lives emotionally
• Avoiding Contact
• Avoidance of marital responsibilities.

Husband's constant failures.

Benefits for the wife:

• Sympathy for your husband, thus elevating your personality
• Blaming husband for all failures
• Feeling of superiority
• Successful careerist
• Avoiding sexual relations or cheating with pleasure
• Financial management

Benefits for husband:

• Sympathy, self-pity
• Doesn't take any action to promote itself
• Favorite phrase: “That’s who I am”
• Addiction (alcoholism, games, computer, etc.)
• doing nothing
• Sits on his wife's neck
• Avoidance of responsibility

Child Benefits:

• Parental manipulation
• Transition from one parent to another
• Failure in school, or the exact opposite - academic success, as proof to an unsuccessful parent of their success
• Statements of failure are devalued and mean nothing to him.

In any such situation, all benefits overlap between family members. And each, accordingly, has its own benefit. The child is not the main element of the system. It can easily return to its previous state.

How to change the system or exit it?

I’m not talking about a coherent system, where all the elements in it are easy and comfortable, where everyone is harmonious, happy and tirelessly improving themselves . Now I’m talking about a system in which a person is unhappy on an unconscious level, but constantly seeks benefit for himself and continues to live in this system, without changing himself or trying to do anything to change it .

But the thing is that usually people are drawn to where they are familiar, regardless of whether it is pleasant or disgusting to them, but only because it is familiar. But if a person does everything to make something change, but no changes occur, then he can get out of it himself. What do you think, readers, how? And I will continue.

When people are getting ready to get married, they make one big mistake called UNAWARENESS. They do not ask themselves and each other the most important question: “Why are we creating a family?” Not to mention the answers to it, which simply do not exist. It seems to them that passion and romance will remain with them forever. But “gray” everyday life comes... But in order to be happy throughout your life together, you need to work on yourself and your relationships tirelessly. It is necessary to protect and store them like the apple of your eye. "For what?" - some will ask. You have to answer this question yourself, for yourself.

Delayed secondary benefit

Sometimes a secondary benefit, which a person did not even think about, catches up with him after a certain time. Imagine a girl who breaks her leg out of the blue and at the most inopportune time. A crucial moment and the threat of layoffs at a promising job, an upcoming trip abroad in a month, etc. According to the usual logic, she should have been present at work, flashed before her boss and completed work with the project.

The girl accidentally found out that the fracture that left her bedridden had brought quite tangible benefits a few days later, after taking a pregnancy test. Thanks to the fracture, she was able to spend the first critical three months at home. Today, years later, she remembers this turning point with gratitude. Without him, taking into account her medical record, everything could have ended completely differently.

People defend nothing as fiercely as their own pain and helplessness, which has become a habit. And most often, the underlying reason is the lack of purpose and desire to meet oneself.

Patients who are “accustomed” to being sick and “to the fullest” use of secondary benefits become a real challenge for the psychotherapist. They really don’t want to admit that the basis of a bunch of diseases is not harmful viruses and infections, but manifestations of laziness, fears and fear of responsibility, elevated to the level of a clinic. Most of us, yearning for warmth and attention, have at least once succumbed to the temptation to be the center of attention, even in such an unconventional way. The main thing is the other side of the coin, which we often forget about, or don’t even know about.

Benefits of being a victim

Masochists derive pleasure from pain, but victims of secondary gain are smart and calculating. They don't do rash things. They are led by cold calculation. A woman who marries a tyrant knows her husband's potential. Even before the wedding, the girl noticed the habits of her chosen one more than once, and she perfectly understands where such personality traits will lead to a relationship. Nevertheless, she agrees to marry the despot. It is impossible to call such a circumstance a rash step. A person always knows where this or that action will lead him. And when, over time, the woman’s husband begins to show his despotic character, the girl begins to run around among friends and complain about her lover. What is the benefit of the lady? She receives warmth and care that she could not find in marriage. And she is quite satisfied with the attention that close and sympathetic people surround her with. The woman does not want to change her position, since she enjoys being in front of everyone and acting as a victim.

Result

Secondary gain is a common cause of many problems and failures. Why is it still secondary? Because the primary thing is loss. In particular, such a loss may be illness. And only then the patient receives his “bonus” for losing - excessive attention from loved ones; the opportunity to completely legally take time off from work you don’t like, meeting with colleagues whose presence causes a nervous shock; or the opportunity to hold a loved one by your bed. And then along the long list of unfulfilled desires. In any case, the primary loss is from which the person himself suffers, and which is obvious to an external observer. The gain received unconsciously, in the form of secondary benefit, is very clearly felt, although it is not realized.

The very sequence of events determines the outcome. A person wants to get rid of a loss, but cannot and does not want to decide on this, since with a loss the benefit itself will melt away. In reality, a person either hangs around in illness, delaying his recovery, or hangs between two poles, periodically recovering and falling ill again. Alternatively, recovery from one illness and illness from another may occur.

If we describe the secondary cause in a few words, we can compare it to resistance. Moreover, we are not talking about resistance to something external, but resistance to the very possibility of change. In truth, a person is not at all inclined to get rid of the situation that worries him, although he himself is not aware of this fact.

Scales

Libra is one of the most controversial signs in the zodiac. They are in constant doubt, trying to please everyone around them, and are cautious even where this is not at all necessary. In addition, Libra can be very careless with other people's secrets and secrets. And with family and loved ones they can behave like real tyrants. In a word, it’s still a set of qualities.

Another property of Libra is the ability to adapt to any circumstances. In itself, this is not bad. But representatives of this sign often use this skill to their detriment. They pretend that everything is fine when it is not at all. And very skillfully, no one will even suspect. They may pretend that they are simply delighted with the person. In fact, it may make them sick. All this requires a lot of strength and energy from Libra. And the hardest thing is that when they come home to their family, they throw off their mask and pour out all the accumulated negativity and fatigue on their loved ones.

So is it good or bad?

There are no absolutely bad and absolutely good things in nature, and there cannot be. We apply the subjective labels at our disposal ourselves. Consciousness helps us in this, and the unconscious reasons, sees further and deeper. It is able to see both sides of the coin, and white in black. Therefore, secondary benefit - as a tool that protects the human psyche - was, is and will be. The whole question comes down to how beneficial it is for us? To what extent can it determine/limit human behavior? To what extent is it realized?

Of course, for a person who knows his goal and is moving towards it, focusing on secondary benefits is one of the proven ways to deprive himself of any opportunity to change. As long as the secondary benefit exists, fundamental psychological changes will not be able to occur. And we are left with only two options: either identify it, realize it and make a decision on how to continue to be with it and at the same time with ourselves; or endure and perceive it as a fact until receiving it loses its meaning for us.

Imagine if your illness allowed you to hold on to your loved one. And now he is gone - the meaning was lost, but the illness also subsided. And no magic.

The benefits of loneliness

Have you met men who consider their loneliness a curse? There are many such representatives of the strong half of humanity. What kind of people find secondary benefits of loneliness? A person who complains to others that he cannot find a normal girl is actually showing off. A man enjoys single life. He does not have to take care of anyone, and there is no need to share a roof over his head with someone. You can change girls every two weeks, and wild parties will help brighten up lonely evenings. The man feels great and simply doesn’t understand why he needs to change things. Yes, consciously the guy knows that he needs to have a family and children, but subconsciously the man has not yet reached his emotional maturity, when he is finally ready to take responsibility not only for his own, but also for someone else’s life.