The Right to Feel: 5 Steps to Develop Emotional Intelligence

Ovulation as the main reason for feeling full

During ovulation, painful sensations occur in the lower abdomen, which is associated with the rapid maturation and release of the egg from the ovarian follicle. Among the causes of a feeling of fullness in the lower abdomen, besides pregnancy, this condition is the most common.

The process is connected with the fact that at a certain point the body produces a large amount of progesterone, which is necessary for pregnancy and gestation. The structure of the uterus changes, the mucous membrane thickens, and blood flows. This state is responsible for the feeling of fullness.

Pulling sensations during ovulation can be very strong, especially in the presence of diseases of the pelvic organs: inflammation, prolapse, developmental abnormalities. If pregnancy does not occur, the fertilized egg is rejected along with the endometrium and eliminated.

Radical forgiveness as a means to get rid of guilt

I repeat: constant experiences and depressing feelings of guilt and shame can force a person to punish himself again and again, both on a conscious and subconscious level.

An effective method of getting rid of guilt is the so-called “radical forgiveness.” It was developed by English psychotherapist Colin Tipping.

Arguing that there are always “higher divine” reasons behind all life’s troubles and illnesses, Colin Tipping offers a technique accessible to everyone that transforms the worldview and heals on the spiritual and physical levels.

On the subject: Radical forgiveness or how to become happy despite everything

The system of radical forgiveness involves working on yourself “through the heart” and not “through the mind.” Its meaning is as follows.

Purification from worries, worries and pain is possible only through a deep understanding of all life events, self-acceptance and the realization that in any situation there is neither right nor wrong, neither good nor bad.

This method will help you “justify” yourself: you will be convinced that all your actions in the past were absolutely correct and simply could not have been otherwise. After all, they are part of the “higher plan.”

The Tipping method has many advantages, the main ones:

• Efficiency;
• Simplicity and accessibility;
• An opportunity to see the world in a new way, from a different angle.

The radical forgiveness system is based on a questionnaire containing a series of open-ended questions that must be answered in writing. You can find this questionnaire in Colin Tipping's book Radical Forgiveness, which also contains detailed instructions on how to fill it out.

An important part of the technique of radical forgiveness is recognizing the negative emotions that accompany self-rejection, self-judgment and self-resentment, and working with them constructively.

Colin Tipping writes:

The goal of radical forgiveness is to see the truth behind the surface of visible events and find the love that is present in every situation.

In other words, you cannot condemn and blame yourself for the past, denying some feelings in yourself. In every emotion, in every situation, you can find truth and see love.

Very often guilt is born as a result of non-acceptance of oneself, some of one’s qualities, feelings and emotions. You berate yourself for not meeting society's standards and ideals.

But understand: feelings like anger, jealousy, envy and the like are not at all “bad”, as is commonly believed. There is no need to deny them in yourself, suppress them or be ashamed of their manifestation.

Whatever your emotions are, you must “feel” and “live” them exactly as they arise - for they are manifestations of your true being.

All emotions are perfect, they are all “good”, there are no “bad” ones. If in a problematic life situation or conflict you felt one of them, it means it’s necessary, it means that it was exactly what you needed at that moment in time, it means that there was a “higher meaning and intention” in this, even if you don’t have them yet are clear. Therefore, you have absolutely nothing to judge yourself for!

Realize that guilt only exists in your head.

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It does not go away and continues to destroy you only because it is your choice.
This happens due to self-dislike and lack of self-acceptance. But don’t forget - every situation and every result is perfect.

Let me give you a short excerpt from Colin Tipping’s book Radical Forgiveness.

I free myself from any need to cling to negative emotions and ideas that carry limitations and dissatisfaction with myself. I refuse to direct my energy into the past and break down all the barriers that have separated me from the love and abundance that I possess.

I, the creator of my thoughts, feelings and life, regain the right to unconditionally love and support myself - as I am, in all my splendor.

In other words, you must teach yourself that it is okay to make mistakes. Tell yourself that you accept and love yourself. Take the blame away! You are perfect and are not to blame for anything. Self-judgment is the key to all your problems. Admit your innocence yourself, and the whole world will recognize you as innocent.

Premenstrual syndrome

Some women acutely feel PMS and experience unpleasant symptoms of its onset:

• bloating, feeling of swelling and fullness;
• weight gain up to 3 kg;
• the appearance of nausea;
• emotional instability;
• bowel dysfunction;
• lower back pain 1-2 days before menstruation;
• headaches, fatigue;
• stool disorder.

The feeling of fullness persists until day 3-4 of the cycle. Unpleasant symptoms often develop in those women who lack vitamins and microelements. Women who are regularly exposed to stress are most susceptible to PMS.

Follicular cyst

Formed at the site of a burst follicle in the ovary (more common in women aged 35-40 years). Women at risk include women who have had cysts or irregular menstruation. A similar pathology may appear in those who have previously treated infertility or suffered from hormonal imbalance. Symptoms can be extremely unpleasant: nausea, acute pain, high fever.

The feeling of fullness may be associated with bloating and flatulence, which appear in response to hormonal changes during ovulation, during menstruation and during conception.

Right and wrong feelings

Ecology of Life: One magazine conducted a survey of famous comedians. They were asked to talk about life situations in which they would like to return and change the course of events. Four people responded. One was sincere, one was somehow unclear, and two... Two answered “correctly.”

One magazine conducted a survey of famous comedians. They were asked to talk about life situations in which they would like to return and change the course of events. Four people responded. One was sincere, one was somehow unclear, and two... Two answered “correctly.”

I will probably join the ranks of opponents of changes in such situations. Life should not be viewed as some kind of opportunity, a point to which you can return and change it. Everything that happens to us in life (including mistakes!) is given to us for a specific purpose. And it’s not worth changing, much less returning to the past. Maybe something wrong in the past led to a series of good things. And I find mistakes useful. Let everything be as it happens, it’s better not to influence the passage of time!

This is not an answer to the question. I agree with the psychologist who commented on these words that this is a speculative construct that lives in the head, but not in the heart. The question “what do you regret in the past” is followed by an abstract reasoning about why there is no need to regret.

A situation that happened in the past has already happened and cannot be changed. There is no point in thinking about her, much less thinking that you could influence her. In this regard, I would like to recall the favorite joke of one of my good friends: “Women, you shouldn’t chase a man’s woman like a departing tram, remember that the next one is coming behind it.”

To be honest, it’s not funny and not sincere. Another “correct answer”, deeply formal and essentially not answering the question.

I don’t believe such answers, intellectual constructions read somewhere in textbooks. Lately I have been meeting quite a lot of people who can be roughly classified into two groups:

a) “Correct Feelers” - they try to build their feelings in accordance with certain patterns that prescribe some emotions and “cancel” others.

b) “Not feeling at all.” Unlike the former, they do not mask their emotions - they are not aware of them. They are otherwise called “alexithymic,” but I will write about them in a separate post.

So, “the ones who feel right.” They often love theories that tell them which emotions are “right” and which ones should be avoided. These are not only lovers of popular psychology, but - even more so - lovers of esotericism and “spiritual practices,” as well as religious people. For example, in Christianity there are clearly defined “bad” emotions and states - anger, envy, sexual attraction to officially unapproved men/women, etc. There are many popular and not so popular typologies in which different types of people are prescribed different feelings or a tendency to experience certain feelings.

So here it is. ALL PEOPLE EXPERIENCE THE SAME EMOTIONS. Emotions have a biological basis, performing evaluative and motivational functions (inducement to activity). In Soviet-Russian psychology, it is customary to separate emotions and feelings, explaining the latter as socially conditioned and clearly individualized emotional processes, but in reality the boundary between them is very blurred. Emotions and feelings are not “right” or “wrong”. They reflect our psyche’s assessment of how things are going and encourage us to do at least something, including thinking. Envy, anger, fear, shame, guilt - they all act as regulators of our lives, and in the appropriate situation they are constructive, not destructive. But the thesis “every situation in life has an adequate emotion” is replaced by “there are emotions that are generally inadequate.” And then it begins...

I find it very difficult to believe people who:

a) They say that they “don’t regret anything in their lives.” This means they have never made any serious mistakes. I doubt. Another thing is that you can devalue what happened.

b) They declare that they love all people (children, animals... insert as appropriate) - even those whom they have just seen for the first time in their lives. Such “love” is very typical for the “spiritually advanced”, but for some reason other people, who are not very “spiritual”, often perceive it as detachment and insensitivity. You can hide very well behind “love for everyone” - from the possible aggression of other people (I love you!), or from real contact with your own feelings, including the “wrong” ones.

c) They say that they “don’t envy anyone.” Then these are either narcissists (which is likely), or people who have absolutely everything they want (which is unlikely, unless it is in a Tibetan or some other monastery).

d) They say that “being angry is stupid.” Anger is not an intellectual feeling at all, and is not subject to “smartness” in any way.

e) They declare that they easily forgive everyone and everything. Often, however, they remember well who and what they forgave.

There are also people who are never jealous, never lose heart, never afraid, always responsible and conscious (the list goes on and on)…

There is a great temptation to find a beautiful theory and try to subordinate your emotions to it. “Emotions must be controlled by reason” - this slogan is already outdated. Emotions and reason are not two independent categories, they are ONE category. People with “turned off” emotions can think rationally as much as they want, but they will not be able to perform two operations: start thinking on their own (since there is no internal stimulus) and make a decision (the “emotional brain”, the limbic system, is responsible for making decisions). What happens if you turn off your mind is also quite clear.

“Feeling correctly” means ignoring the occurrence of some emotions in oneself, suppressing them, avoiding them at all costs. But you cannot suppress “bad emotions” without suppressing “good” ones. Having gotten rid of intense grief or fear, we simultaneously lose the opportunity to experience intense joy or inspiration. Either the whole range of emotional experiences is available to us, or none... People taking antidepressants often complain that the world has become “gray”, and they themselves live as if in a fog (this does not mean that antidepressants are evil!).

Another aspect of ignoring emotions is the inclusion of projections. That is, repressed emotions begin to be attributed to other people, not to themselves. And then there are only “slanderers and envious people”, “losers”, “aggressors”, “lustful rapists” and so on. The ones who succeed most in ousting are fanatics, and it doesn’t matter what they are - religious, atheistic, political, and so on. They simply liken them to “evil”, which they fight fanatically, displacing from their consciousness everything that so closely unites them with the “enemy”. After all, these are wrong feelings, thoughts and experiences... Repressed anger can be disguised as suffocating love when we are “benefited” or “done good.”

In general, living people experience the full range of emotions inherent in humans. Smart talk about how it is “stupid” or “irrational” to experience something remains smart talk, and emotions continue to flow from all the cracks in the supposedly impenetrable fence of rationality. It’s stupid not to be angry, envious, angry, greedy, and so on. It would be stupid not to recognize oneself as a human being and, accordingly, the experience of these emotions. Yes, we cannot prevent the occurrence of certain emotional states. But if we are aware of them, we can influence their manifestations. Express, translate into action, find out the causes of occurrence, satisfy needs. But only if we acknowledge their existence.published

Author: Ilya Latypov

PS And remember, just by changing your consciousness, we are changing the world together! © econet

Dangerous symptoms requiring medical attention

If the feeling of fullness in the lower abdomen does not appear before menstruation and is accompanied by unpleasant symptoms, you should consult a doctor. The most dangerous signs are:

• sharp pain radiating to the lower back, abdomen, thighs;
• heat;
• purulent, profuse bloody or other discharge;
• nausea and vomiting;
• pale skin;
• dizziness, lethargy, decreased blood pressure;
• constant digestive problems, constipation;
• urinating too frequently;
• abdominal muscle tension.

These conditions may indicate pathologies such as appendicitis, salpingoophoritis, ectopic pregnancy, cyst rupture, and fibroids.

Features of diagnosing the condition

If painful sensations and a feeling of fullness, distension persist for longer than 2-3 days, you should consult a gynecologist. Next, the doctor will prescribe examination by other specialists and recommend other diagnostic methods:

• vaginal and cervical smear;
• urine and blood tests;
• Ultrasound;
• laparoscopy in the absence of other examinations.

If pathologies are associated with gastrointestinal diseases, an endoscopic examination of the intestine may be required.

Bladder diseases

A common cause of discomfort in the bladder area is cystitis. This disease often develops against the background of decreased immunity. Cystitis is infectious in nature and is characterized by inflammation of the organ mucosa. Specific symptoms of the disease:

• the bladder is constantly full;
• frequent urge to urinate without relief;
• spastic pain;
• foreign matter in urine
• pain and burning in the urethra.

After visiting the restroom, you may find bloody spots or light flakes in your urine, which indicates bacterial inflammation. A feature of the disease is difficulty urinating. After visiting the restroom, the urge to urinate appears again after a few minutes. The frequency of urges reaches 10-15 per hour.

Another cause of discomfort in the bladder is calculi (stones). Pain, a feeling of fullness and distension in the organ appear when formations are displaced, for example, after physical activity. If the stones are large, the lining of the organ may be damaged and blood may appear in the urine.

The same signs are characteristic of pyelonephritis - bacterial damage to the kidneys.

With urethritis (inflammation of the urethra), there may be a feeling of incomplete emptying of the bladder along with a frequent urge to urinate. The increased frequency of urges is caused by irritation of the inflamed urethra. There may be pain when urinating.